3.07.2010

Scarred

Scarred Have you ever seen that show Scarred on MTV?  If not, its a show about the scars people have and how they got them.  Of course the people they focus on are skateboarders, BMX-ers, quad racers and the like… but what about the scars cancer patients bear?  The show on MTV focuses on mostly fearless people who race headfirst into these situations that most of us consider dangerous – you might call them bad asses? 

Well I think cancer survivors are pretty bad ass too.  From diagnosis to treatment to remission cancer patients go through more emotional and physical turmoil than most people will in a lifetime.  We come out of it with battle scars and survival stories of our own that are worth telling.

Recently, a blogger I follow posted a link thyroid_surgery_adto a blog she reads and an ad that has caused quite the controversy at least in the world of thyroid disease and cancer patients of all kinds.  To a cancer patient this is a almost like a slap in the face – are you less beautiful because you have a scar?  Are you less beautiful because you fought to LIVE and not just be a decoration in life?  As someone who has a scar from the removal of my cancer, I can tell you that a scar wasn’t even a thought in my mind.  Actually I was consumed with how soon I could get my treatments, what I could and couldn’t eat, and what were my odds of survival?

That being said, I hate my scar.

DSCN0324 I am not at the point where I can proudly point to the shiny, pink, puffy, burning, aching… daily reminder that the cells in my body turned against me.  I know I will get there because everything I have been through has made me stronger and deserves to be celebrated – but I'm not there yet.   

Would I have opted for the “no scar” surgery?  I really don’t think so.  The only ways I can see you not getting an outside scar is either a) cutting through the internal neck structures or b) burning the thyroid out with RAI.  My treatment dose was hell enough to go through so just the thought makes me shudder.  Both of those options to me are much less appealing than living with a scar.  DSCN0707

I am now obsessed with necks, searching for a scar twin.  Maybe one day my scar will spark a connection with someone else who needs a scar twin too?

5 comments:

  1. I feel the anti-scar sentiment. I absolutely despise my port scars! Good luck in the search for your neck-twin :)

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  2. Catherine Bell (actress) has a scar from thyroid cancer and she refuses to cover it because she thinks it's cool. Amazing role model!

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  3. Uhm, that ad makes it sound like every woman is a shallow idiot who is incapable of thinking of anything more than her looks. "Beauty is important to every woman." Really?? Because what's more important to me right now is that I get a shower every day!

    And PS - scar or no scar, I still think you're beautiful!

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  4. I have a scar from 1982 - I used to say that it ended my career as a topless dancer. However, it is no longer the vivid purple scar it started out as. Now it is almost invisible. Wear your scar proudly!

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  5. Hi Christina! I'm Ann, a friend and coworker of your Aunt Pat. I'll be your scar/neck twin! I just love your post. I know that Pat has talked to you about me. I found out in Feb. that I have thyroid cancer. My biggest concern prior to surgery was the scar that would be so noticeable when you looked at me. But since the cancer was confirmed, I feel like the scar is my badge of honor, my battle scar(although I would rather not have it). Also whenever it bugs/pains me, it makes me remember that I am in it to win it and that our God is Great and he will heal all. It also allows me to talk about how God's grace is enough. I would love to get together sometime...here's my email: anntubergen@yahoo.com.
    I think that your scar looks great!

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