2.15.2010

Cancer Outbreak

In the last 5 days, 3 people I know were diagnosed with cancer. It’s like an epidemic or something.  Has it always been like this or am I just hypersensitive to others with cancer since my own diagnosis? 

That could be it actually - hypersensitive.  Once you have this diagnosis you become part of a club with exclusive membership that you never wanted to be part of… but you know that only other club members can truly understand what you are going through.  It is completely impossible to describe the emotional whirlwind you go through on a daily basis – yes, even after you have been treated.  “I’m feeling rundown – is it a cold or is my cancer back?” “My lung hurts when I breathe, have my mets grown?” “The cold air hurts when I breathe it in – what does that mean?”  It might just be my overactive imagination but it seems I'm just so much more aware of every ache and pain in my body. 

I know things are fine right now but there is always a little nagging voice of doubt in the back of your mind.  Maybe its just because it was lab rat day and now I'm waiting on results once again…

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